Something that bugs me

So recently I was at the Hitz.fm Birthday Invasion 2012 ( basically their birthday party). Prior to the event, I looked up info on the event : location, acts, dresscodes etc... And as most of the posts went, it seemed to be a family friendly, local act hyped up event. Which didn't raise any eyebrows.

If you didn't already know, the demographic ( from observation ) for Hitz.fm seem to be between the ages 11- 19 ( agak-agakla, plus minus a minority age group). Also, no where did it say it was for  an >18 crowd.

My expectations:
1.Clean fun
2. pop/hip hop music
3. and kids...lots of them.


What happened :
Lots of kids. Without a doubt. They were everywhere. We came in during the intermission, so when everyone was making their way out for a snack we were just about walking in. You can say they paraded past us. So, yea, lots of kids with the occasional few adults.

Music. As expected, loads of hip hop and rapping. Everyone with their hands in the air saying Yeah Yeahh Yeah! and in between performances they aired music videos which still kept the crowd going (For the most part ) What irked me though, was the choice of songs of the videos. It seems that that as long as you were Top 40 you were in. So call me a conservative, but when songs glorifying  female derriere pop up, I'm not one to condone the fact that young (or maybe not that young) school children are exposed to this. I'm also not saying that they never get exposed to stuff like this, but.... you'd think that an organization (of sorts) that wishes kids "GOOD LUCK for your PMR" would be encouraging something like this?

Like I mentioned earlier, based on their ads, it came across as a for all ages thing, even kids included, seeing how there were actually kids there with their parents. yes,kids. running around. main-main catching.

Which bring us to the clean fun.
A number of the rap verses were peppered with swear words. Performers actually using the big F word when hyping up the crowd (of kids). I'm not sure what the planning was like when they let kids in and then gave no restrictions to their performers.

I'm not going into details.Maybe not now. Just dissatisfied that Hitz.FM which has a large following of young people are not being responsible in how they present themselves or in how they are indirectly encouraging such behaviour. I'm not angel and I'm no prude, but I definitely wouldn't want to be a "source" of "encouragement" when it comes to things like this, as menial and small it may seem.

Dreams #5632

This is an old dream,but,finally got around to getting it down.(for reasons)

As usual in the array of non-sequential dreams, this one stood out.It was, lets call him Lex, and it was a regular day in the car. He was driving ( it was either of our cars,that i remember clearly) and we were just talking. Nothing unusual there. I was looking out the passenger side window while talking and we stopped at a traffic light. I turned back to look at him and was startled as he was leaning in close to my side, looking intently at me.

More curious than freaked out, I stared back, albeit questioningly. Then BAM. He kissed me. I was surprised at first, but I didn't stop him. A short while later, we pulled apart, as the light turned green. He straightened up and put the gear into drive. I was quiet, wondering what just happened and he shot me a grin.

"I always wanted to try that"

I only smiled and said, "really" (without the ?)

And then for the next part of the dream was just grey industrial buildings.
And normally I don't mind telling my dreams, but this took me awhile to get out.for some reason i was pretty embarrassed.

dreams#3451

it was so odd. in my dream i was about 26?27? my hair was long and all black,but slightly wavy. i was wearing loose boot cut jeans and a plain tank. i wasn't wearing thick framed glasses anymore,but normal wire frames. I met up with a bunch of people in a restaurant, they were surprised that i was in such a hurry. They asked us to have a seat, but i had no time. i passed around the wedding invites, remembering clearly asking them to not tell anyone or talk about it outside this circle. i wouldn't tell them why. Some expressed how disappointed they were in not being asked to help plan for it,and the fact it was exclusive and so hush hush.

i remember feeling bad for letting them down and not letting them be involved with the planning,but i can't remember what my reasons were.

i cannot remember who i was going to marry. and i'm surprised my hair is all black.given the colour it is now.
i have not worn bootcut jeans in forever. what happened to my glasses!

RESOLUSI #323 of 2012

look in the mirror everyday and like what i see. Be it just jeans n tshirt, be it without make up... I WILL BE HAPPY. try to stop judging myself and my flaws. So what if my arms are big and flabby, my thighs touch and i have a slight muffin top. if so many other people can be happy in their own skin, why can't i?

why do i allow what people say about my weight to affect me? they may say i'm fat and flabby , i have bad skin or that i look pregnant, my thighs look huge, why is this pimple so big... I should learn to let it go.

I can do better, but I AM GOOD ENOUGH.

So it's done

So it's done, i did it. What is it about watching and listening to yourself that is so annoying :(
maybe i really am that annoying,but it had to be done. And what are the odds someone decides to try out his recording device while i'm there.(at least he doesnt think i sound like a goat D:) and it's done...

i hope he likes it . *crosses fingers* Cannot wait for family time!

tiny ditty

we don't got a lot of dough
and we don't have any snow
we don't know what the new year holds
but there's one thing that i do know

 you're all here with me
you mean more than the tree
even more than all the presents
underneath

We don't need a lot of money
to make our Christmas sunny (it's free!)
We don't need fancy a car
and we don't need to travel far


you're all here with me
you mean more than the tree
even more than all the presents
underneath

underneath
underneath

Is not about the game or toys
not about the crowds or noise
it's bout friends and family
all you dearest ones to me

:) Merry Christmas

things to be thankful for #595958

such busy weeks before and ahead of me.I haven't had time to be thankful for what i have. But the little things do matter. things have been so overwhelming and i  haven't really been allowing myself to express what i really feel inside. and like it or not, that's not me. I can't really work like this. So I'm going to just list down things i'm grateful for. i will try not  to feel guilty for feeling happy.i deserve to be happy once in a while.


-long line for consultation,but we did the basic 3d for it already. Told the lecturer we'll come  back when the line is shorter but he offered to consult our work at the pc straight away. Nothing else but God's hand in that.
-good friends who offer helping hands when yu need them
-friends who are good company to help you take your mind off things and who remind you that it's ohkay to laugh and be happy now and then.
-the feeling of peace where short tempers used to rise.
-progress is being able to let go (better than nothing)
-awesome weekends
-being able to make the best out of a down turned situation.

-being able to have family time :)



mantra of the day: i have the right to feel happy. as long as no one else gets hurt.